NFL Week 2 Picks

In order to prepare us for our post-21 lives, we (being Zach Altschuler and Forrest Richardson) have decided to track our picking prowess for the 2013 NFL season – and being the generous we are, we decided to make it available to you.

Here are our Week 2 picks (ATS, because we are all men here):

RAVENS (-7) over Browns

Does anyone in Cleveland really believe Brandon Weedon is the solution? The Champs are coming home, and no one pulls off “we got stomped so time to make a statement” quite like Joe Flacco.

TEXANS (-8.5) over Titans

When was the last time there was a team as good and as boring to watch as the Texans at the same time? Still, it is the Titans. (Zach has observed I’ve started the first two picks with questions – we’ll see where this takes us).

COLTS (-2) over Dolphins

I can see Sohail arguing with us over this pick, but we just don’t trust the Dolphins. Not that we trust the Colts either. But in Andrew Luck we trust.

BILLS (+3) over Panthers

Because Carolina sucks at winning.

FALCONS (-5) over Rams

We had a debate earlier over which team currently has the most future Hall of Famers on their roster, and we like the Falcons chances. Seriously, check this list: Tony Gonzalez (lock), Matt Ryan (probable if career arc continues), Steven Jackson (maybe), Julio Jones (potentially), Roddy White (doubtful). We could only come up with one team even close to this (Denver). As for the pick, the Falcons come into the Georgia Dome after a loss to their most hated rivals; yeah, everyone is pissed. You’d be crazy to pick otherwise.

Redskins (+7) over PACKERS

When we went to look at the lines for this week, this one inspired an award for how crazy it is: the weekly “Michele Bachmann” award. Every week, we’re going to give this out to one line we think is just flat out ridiculous. Seriously, how are the Packers getting SEVEN points? We know: RGIII and Alfred Morris looked shaky at best last week, and Rodgers and the Packers come into their season opener at Lambeau after a heated loss to the 49ers, but seven seems just generous. Take the points.

CHIEFS (-3) over Cowboys

The narrative of the Tony Romo era has officially shifted from “worst-best QB ever” to “best-worse QB ever”. Seriously, coverage of the Cowboys has me feeling bad for the guy. We know Jamaal Charles may not be 100%, and that we should take last week’s win with a grain of salt – but really, I’m just a giant homer.

Vikings (+6) over BEARS

Zach is taking over the keyboard now. 6 is a big spread, even for Chicago coming off an impressive win at home and the Vikings coming off a bad loss at the Lions. Adrian Peterson is probably due for a huge game.

Saints (-3) over BUCS

Josh Freeman and Cam Newton are currently competing for the young QB with the most wasted potential. Drew Brees may be the most overachieving QB in NFL history.

Lions (-1.5) over CARDINALS

Could the Lions actually redeem themselves after last season’s complete meltdown? And remember when Carson Palmer was actually good. That was only like, four years ago. We don’t have much hope for the Palmer era in Arizona.

RAIDERS (-5) over Jags

If you watch the entirety of this game on Sunday, you have a gambling problem.

GIANTS (+4) over Broncos

Eli could be due for a bounce back game after the worst 36-31 victory ever last Sunday. Brother Peyton cannot possibly play as well this week…. Or can he? Eli is 0-2 in Brother Bowls so somehow Forrest thinks this he’ll win this week out of spite for his fraternal brethren.

EAGLES (-7) over Chargers

One of the toughest games to pick the Eagles seems like the ultimate boom or bust team. We think the Eagles will play amazing this week, having nothing to do with the fact that they are playing the Chargers. Plus Oregon highlights came on as we were writing this so that has to be a sign.

SEAHAWKS (-3) over 49ers

Best game of the week and maybe the year. One of us thinks Seattle is the best team in the NFL, the other thinks it’s the 49ers. Anyways we debated for 15 minutes on this pick and the reason Seattle came out on top is solely for the insane home-field advantage they will have. Can you imagine if they break the decibel record for the loudest sporting event ever and still don’t win?

BENGALS (-7) over Steelers

The Steelers are about to be, or are already, in free fall. Plus the Bengals are legitimately the better team, which feels a very weird thing to say considering this is Cincy we’re talking about.

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And there you have it. We’ll be back on Tuesday to laugh at how bad we did, or bask in the glory of our achievement. Either way, it should be a fun ride.

Let the debate begin.

-ZA, FR